Marriage always divides people’s lives to “before” and “after”, even if the couple used to live together before the official ceremony. How to mitigate this transition and make it a source of happiness and new opportunities rather than stress?
Trick #1: Change “I” to “We”. From now on, you and your second half are going to be a family unit, so it’s very important to form a new self-identification. Try to prioritize your mutual interests and goals over individual ones, and always regard your husband’s problems and preoccupations as if they concerned both of you.
Trick #2: Accept new responsibilities. A married life is associated with a whole set of new roles and responsibilities. Be prepared that now the way you keep your house and spend money has a direct impact on your partner, so always think of both of you before taking any decision.
Trick #3: Respect the differences. No two people are identical, and marriage will inevitably reveal all the aspects in which you and your spouse differ from each other – from daily regime and eating habits to the way the two of you see your future home, income, and children. Having negotiated the main questions while still ashore, try to tolerate other small differences without attempting to eliminate them at all costs.
Trick #4: Keep communicating. Any relationship sooner or later produces certain difficulties that have to be wisely dealt with. Remember that your partner can’t read your mind, so if there’s something that scares or disappoints you, don’t hesitate to share it. Not only will this make your husband feel proud of becoming your confidant but will also more likely generate good ideas for resolving the problem.
Trick #5: Be open to changes. Life is a never-dying stream, and no one knows what will expect your family in 5 or 10 years’ time. Try to be flexible and don’t disregard new potential opportunities, be it moving to another city or simply redoing your kitchen.
Trick #6: Don’t cut off. Becoming a married couple doesn’t mean you shall abandon your former life completely. Keep seeing your friends, do your hobbies, and use other means to recharge your batteries (and make sure your husband has the same opportunity).
Trick #7: Have faith. In the course of your married life, there would be numerous ups and downs but a truly loving couple can overcome any difficulty regardless of its nature and duration. Stay optimistic and support your partner, even if your family’s current financial or psychological situation is far from being ideal.